The Sound of Music

By: Snazzo

* * * *

Libby was folding her laundry in her room, her stereo playing loudly. She danced as she put her blouses into her dresser and her jeans into her closet.

“This is WRET, where Retroville rocks!” the stereo said. “This is Larry in the morning, news, weather and traffic coming up on the hour, but now another commercial free Rock Pack! And now a new song by that hot new group, Melvin and the Mindbenders! Invisible Touch!”

Well I've been waiting, waiting here so long
But thinking nothing, nothing could go wrong, ooh now I know
She has a built in ability
To take everything she sees
And now it seems I'm falling, falling for her.

She seems to have an invisible touch yeah
She reaches in, and grabs right hold of your heart
She seems to have an invisible touch yeah
It takes control and slowly tears you apart.

Libby suddenly froze in the middle of the room. Her shirts fell from her arms to the floor at her feet.

“What on earth is that?” Libby cried aloud, horrified.

Libby knew the original song well. Phil Collins and Genesis, released in 1986, went to Number One on the Billboard Top 100. It was a bit of an oldie, but still a good song. But this remake! A beat that sounded like a diseased monkey on the drums. A high-pitched wailing in what must have been someone sick attempt at singing; she could hardly make out the words. Libby had heard better voices on Retroville Idol. The guitar sounded like a room full of screeching cats. With a look of disgust Libby flicked the stereo over to CD and Boyz 2 Men came on. Libby sighed in relief, picked up her shirts, did a twirl, and resumed putting away her laundry.

* * * *

The next day Libby sat in the schoolbus, her headphones on, humming Snoopy and the Doggy Dogs song “Don’t Touch That!” The bus stopped, and Carl, Jimmy, and Cindy came aboard. Jimmy and Carl sat down in a seat together, while Cindy set next to her friend.

“Hi Cindy!” Libby said.

“Hiya Libs!” Cindy returned.

“Did you do that history report on the Battle of Gettysburg?” Libby asked.

Cindy didn’t answer. She just sat on the seat, her head rocking back and forth a little, a smile on her face.

“Hey!” Libby said, touching Cindy on the arm. “Cindy?”

Cindy shook her head and looked at Libby. “What? Or sorry Libs, I was daydreaming a bit.”

“About Jimmy I bet,” Libby said.

“Yes, about Jimmy,” Cindy answered, then began to hum a little tune.

“Did you do that history report on the Battle of Gettysburg?” Libby repeated the question.

“The what?” Cindy asked.

Libby laughed. “Boy, you really are gone! I’m the one that’s wearing the headphones. The history report Cindy!”

“Oh,” Cindy said. “No, it kinda slipped my mind.”

“Cindy! Miss Fowl’s gonna be mad.”

Cindy didn’t say anything. She hummed a bit, then said “Well, maybe I can jot something down before the bell rings.”

That wasn’t like Cindy at all, Libby thought. Cindy was right behind Neutron in class. Her mom made her do her homework first thing every night. Buy Cindy didn’t look the least bit concerned. Maybe she was that confident in her grades that she could afford to blow off an assignment.

* * * *

At school, first came English, then a study of Great American Trombone Players, and then history. Libby was a little worried. Cindy was hardly paying attention at all. She just seemed to be humming and daydreaming with a goofy grin on her face. Libby knew Cindy liked Jimmy, but … did something happen between them recently? A kiss? A date? A phone call? Libby thought Cindy was head over heels in love! Libby knew it could happen one of these days, but overnight?

“Now class,” Miss Fowl said, “Pass forward your Gettysburg reports.”

“Gettysburg?” Sheen cried out. “I thought you said Pittsburgh! I did my report on Pittsburgh!”

“Sheen!” Miss Fowl said. “Gettysburg was the turning point of the Civil War! Pittsburgh is an industrial city! How could you get them mixed up?”

“They’re both in Pennsylvania,” Sheen said defensively. “So I was off by a couple hundred miles. Don’t I get credit for coming close?”

“Coming close is only good in a game of horseshoes Sheen!” Miss Fowl said. “Ten demerits. A report on Gettysburg tomorrow or twenty demerits!”

Sheen hung his head.

“Cindy?” Miss Fowl said. “I don’t seem to have your report here!”

Cindy sat at her desk, in a daze.

“Cindy?” Miss Fowl said again.

“Hm? Oh, sorry Miss Fowl. Um. Humphrey ate my report. You know he likes to eat garbage.”

Many in the class snickered at that.

“I see,” Miss Fowl said. “If I recall, Cindy, you print your reports off your computer, with fancy fonts and everything. Couldn’t you just have printed your report again?”

Cindy didn’t answer.

“Cindy?”

“Hm? Oh, sorry Miss Fowl. Um. Well I ran out of ink. I’ll stop and get some later today and have the report for you first thing tomorrow.”

Miss Fowl didn’t look entirely convinced, but said “Very well. Now class, we’re going to begin our studies on the Why the American Bald Headed Eagle doesn’t use Rogaine!”

Libby was very concerned. She had never seen Cindy in such a helpless daze. She looked at Jimmy, sure he would gloat at having his report done while Cindy’s wasn’t. But Jimmy looked just like Cindy; a smile on his face and a faraway look in his eyes.

Libby swallowed hard. It was true then. Her best friend really had fallen in love! What was going to happen now?

Libby was so concerned with Cindy and Jimmy that she didn’t notice others in the classroom. Behind her Amber, Britney, Ike and Butch all sat quietly, a smile upon their faces and a dazed look in their eyes.

* * * *

Cindy wasn’t much a conversationalist at lunch. So Libby asked if they should move to the guy’s table, where Sheen, Carl and Jimmy were sitting. Cindy agreed. They walked over with their lunch trays and sat down.

“Cindy?” Sheen said. “What are you doing here? We thought you hated us!”

Cindy didn’t reply. She didn’t even say Hi to Jimmy. She just sat down, humming a tune to herself. Libby noted Jimmy was humming himself.

“Guys,” Libby addressed Carl and Sheen. “Has Jimmy been acting weird today?”

“He certainly has!” Sheen declared. “When I told him about last night’s new episode of Ultralord, Ultralord and the Whacky Wombats, he didn’t even ask me about it!”

“Yeah,” Carl agreed. “And when we were in line getting our lunch he almost took goulash instead of pizza! Everyone knows Monday is pizza day!”

“What are you humming Cindy?” Libby asked her friend.

Cindy’s eyes lit up and she turned to Libby eagerly. “Oh, Libs, it’s the best song I ever heard! I can’t get it out of my head! It’s called ‘Invisible Touch’ by Melvin and the Mindbenders!”

“You heard that too?” Jimmy asked Cindy. “Man, I love that song!”

“I never heard that one,” Carl said, munching on some pizza.

“And you don’t want to either!” Libby exclaimed. “Guys, how can you like that trash? I heard it and I couldn’t stand it, it was awful! I had to turn it off before my head exploded. Sheen sings better than that!”

“Thanks Libby!” Sheen said.

“Oh, Libs, give it another try. You’ll love it!” Cindy said. “It’s got a great beat, you can really dance to it. The melody is lovely and the lyrics are fantastic!”

“Yeah, Libby,” Jimmy added. “The harmonics are perfection itself. Do you want me to burn you a copy? I downloaded it from the WRET web site.”

“I’ll take a copy, Jim,” Carl said. “I’d like to hear it.”

“Me too,” Sheen said, “If it’s all that!”

“No thanks!” Libby said. “Once was more than enough!”

* * * *

After school the gang went down to the Candy Bar. Jimmy and Cindy were still in a daze. Libby thought maybe a good sugar rush might help revitalize them.

“What’ll it be?” Sam asked, walking up to the table.

“Sam!” Carl said. “What happened to saying ‘Yeah?’”

“Hm?” Sam asked.

“You always say ‘Yeah’ after everything,” Sheen said.

Sam stood there a moment. Libby raised an eyebrow. Sam had a goofy grin on his face too! Surely Sam hadn’t fallen in love. Libby knew Sam and Miss Fowl had dated a couple times, but she couldn’t believe anything serious could have happened. Not with Sam!

“Oh, yeah!” Sam said. “What’ll it be, yeah?”

“I’d like a Chocolate Salmon Butterscotch milkshake,” Carl said.

“Give me a Chocolate Peanut Butter Fudge Swirl-o-Blast,” Sheen said.

“I’ll have a strawberry-banana cone,” Libby ordered.

Sam looked at Cindy and Jimmy. They looked at him. “Hey, I ain’t got all day to stand here for you to make up your mind, yeah!” Sam said.

“Oh!” Cindy said. “We’ll share a banana blueberry split.”

Sam walked off.

Libby looked over to the jukebox, where Nick was standing. “Hey Nick! How about some tunes?”

“Sure thing, Libby,” Nick said.

“Sorry kids,” Sam said, “The jukebox has butterscotch in it again. So you’ll have to listen to this radio.” Sam pulled out an old radio and sat it on the counter.

Libby heard the end of “A Woman’s Touch” by The Spicy Girls, then she heard Larry the announcer. “And now the song we can’t get enough of! It’s brand new but we’re already getting flooded with requests. ‘Invisible Touch’ by Melvin and the Mindbenders!”

Libby groaned but Cindy and Jimmy jumped out of their seats. “Great! Man I love this song! Now you guys can hear it!” they said excitedly.

“Well I’m not listening to it again!” Libby declared and put her fingers in her ears. She watched Jimmy, Cindy, Sheen, Carl, and even Nick dance to the tune. She thought it odd, it wasn’t really a song you could dance to. After a few minutes it became apparent that the song was over; everyone had stopped dancing, but Libby was concerned. Everyone stood about with a vacant look in their eyes. Libby took her fingers out of her ears. “Cindy? Sheen? Guys?”

“Wasn’t that song awesome Libs?” Cindy gushed, with a big smile upon her face. “Man, I love that song!”

“You should have danced with me, Libby my sweets. That song was fantastic! I haven’t heard such a good song since …” Sheen hesitated, then grinned, “Why I NEVER heard such a good song before! Man, I love that song!”

“Guys!” Libby was frustrated and worried. “That song is horrible! Terrible! Atrocious! Lousy! Nasty! And just plain bad! What’s wrong with you?”

“I think you’re mistaken, Libby,” Cindy said, and the smile vanished from her face.

Sheen put a hand on Libby’s shoulder. “Yes, Libby, I think you need to listen to that song again, to really appreciate it.”

“Sheen, what are you doing?” Libby asked. She tried to shrug off Sheen’s hand but he tightened his grip.

Carl took her right arm and Cindy her left. “Yes, Libby, let’s go listen to that song again,” Carl said.

“Guys!” Now Libby was frightened. Her friends really weren’t acting like themselves. “You’re scaring me! Let me go!”

“Don’t worry Libby, you’re gonna love this!” Sheen said.

“Jimmy! Something’s not right here!” Libby said. “That song, it’s doing something to you guys. I dunno, hypnotizing you or something!”

“A song can’t hypnotize people Libby,” Jimmy said. “You need eye contact to hypnotize someone.”

“Jimmy, please!” Libby pleaded. “Something is wrong here, I can feel it in my bones.”

Jimmy was silent a minute, then said “Perhaps you’re right, Libby. Perhaps I should investigate it. Guys, to the lab!”

Libby sighed in relief. The gang left the Candy Bar. Libby looked back at Nick, zoning out next to the silent jukebox, and Sam, having forgotten their orders, dazed behind the counter.

* * * *

Down at the lab Jimmy typed away at the computer while everyone looked on. “Well, this is interesting!” he announced.

“What is it?” Libby asked.

“Not hypnotism, but subliminal commands on an ultrahigh frequency buried in the song,” Jimmy explained. “Anyone who listens to the song would in effect become a mindless zombie.”

“How do we stop it?” Libby asked.

“We don’t,” Jimmy said.

“What?” Libby was shocked.

“No, Libby, there’s no stopping it this time. All you can do is surrender to it Libby. Vox! Emergency Apprehension Procedure 29, subject Libby Folfax!” Jimmy shouted.

Robotic hands descended from the ceiling, grabbed Libby, and lifted her into the air. She let out a scream. “Jimmy, you can’t do this! I’m your friend!”

Cindy smiled up at her. “Don’t  be scared, Libby, it’s a pleasant sensation once you get used to it.”

Libby turned to Sheen. “Sheen! Do something! Don’t let them do this to me! This is your girlfriend talking!”

Sheen stood with a grin on his face. “Relax, Libby, it’ll be over in two minutes, forty-five seconds.”

“Vox,” Jimmy said, “Play ‘Invisible Touch’ by Melvin and the Mindbenders.”

The song began. Libby tried singing to herself, then out loud, to drown out the music. It was as if ice picks were driving into her ears.

Well I don't really know her, I only know her name
But she crawls under your skin, you're never quite the same, and now I know
She's got something you just can't trust
It's something mysterious
And now it seems I'm falling, falling for her.

She seems to have an invisible touch yeah
She reaches in, and grabs right hold of your heart
She seems to have an invisible touch yeah
It takes control and slowly tears you apart.

Libby struggled then screamed. She could feel the song drilling into her mind, overpowering her. What was she going to do? Suddenly she smiled. “Jimmy! Cindy! You guys were right! That song is AWESOME! Man, I love that song!”

“Vox, stop playback,” Jimmy said. “Do you really think so Libby? I’m a genius but we all know you’re the music expert in this town.”

“Jimmy, I have never heard of a better song in my life,” Libby said. “I could never dream of a better song. ‘Invisible Touch’ is the greatest song in the history of mankind! I love that song!”

“Way to go Libs!” Sheen said, giving her the thumbs up.

“Vox, release Libby Folfax.” Jimmy said. The robotic arms let go of Libby and she fell to the ground with a thump. “Oh, sorry Libby,” Jimmy said, helping her up.

“Libby!” Cindy gave her friend a warm huggle. “I’m so glad you’re one of us now!”

“Oh, me too, Cindy,” Libby said. “I’m gonna run right home and have my parents listen to this song! Bye guys! See you at school tomorrow!”

“Bye Libby!”

* * * *

Libby did hurry home. “Hello, Liberty,” her mom said as she rushed into the house. “How are you today?”

Libby was dismayed to see her mom sitting at the kitchen table, a dazed look in her eyes and a smile upon her face. “Everything’s fine mom!” Libby said, and hurried up to her room. She closed the door then collapsed trembling to the floor. Libby groaned. The song was racing around in her head, she couldn’t get it out of her mind. She knew if she had listened to the entire song she would be helpless, but it could overpower her yet.

How did this happen? Who was doing this? Professor Calamitous? He usually had something to do with robotics though. Eustace Strych? He did bring in that CD that made everyone dance, maybe now he had created some music to make everyone his slaves. Then Libby had it: Grandma Taters! The insane smile, of course! Cindy had said “One of us” too.

Well that was great, but what Libby supposed to do? She took out her cell phone with shaking hands and dialed 911. “Hello, this is 911 Emergency Services,” came a voice. “How may I help you?”

Libby struggled to compose her thoughts. “Officer Tubbs? Retroville is in terrible danger! The whole world might be in terrible danger! Do you remember when the Happy Show Show hypnotized everyone in town? I think Grandma Taters has returned and she’s trying turn everyone into zombies! With a song this time!”

There was a pause on the line.

“Officer Tubbs?” Libby asked.

“Oh, sorry, Miss. You’re right, that is serious. Don’t worry, we’ll be right over to help you.”

“No, wait a minute …” Libby said but only heard a dial tone. Libby put her cell phone back into her jeans. She didn’t like the sound of the police coming right over, it sounded menacing to her mind. She had to do something, and fast, or they would have her.

But what could she do? Libby wasn’t a genius like Jimmy, she didn’t know karate like Cindy. And with them two out of the picture, how was she going to stop this? All she knew was music.

Music! That was it! Libby staggered to her feet. She went to her closet, past her prized collection of CDs. There, organized and alphabetized, were all her favorite discs. She ignored those though and began rummaging deep in her closet, past her old blue dresses that she never wore anymore. Past her collection of Oldie But Goody CDs. Past her collection of Has Been CDs. Past her collection of One Hit Wonder CDs. Down deep, below the Never Listen To Anymore CDs to the truly awful What Was I Thinking CDs. “This is it!” she cried and held up a dusty CD. “Yodeling to the Oldies!”

This music was so atrocious Libby thought it would drown out “Invisible Touch.” She put the CD into her player and put the headphones on. For an instant an overpowering urge came over her, to turn on the FM radio instead of the CD and listen to WRET. She clenched her fist and her jaw, and hit the play button. Nora Roberts, yodeling the Rolling Stones “I Can’t Get No Satisfaction” came on.

Libby sighed in relief. It was like a wave of cool water washing over her. ‘Invisible Touch’ disappeared from her mind and she regained her senses. She put the song on Repeat and decided to keep her headphones on until this was all over.

Now she had to get back out of the house before the police arrived. No doubt they would try to get her to listen to ‘Invisible Touch’ too.

Libby hurried down the stairs. “I’m going over to Cindy’s house mom!” she said. “Back in awhile!”

“Okay, hun,” Libby’s mom said and smiled.

Libby closed the door behind her and stood a moment on the doorstep. What to do? Where to go? She thought she should go back in and cure her mother but then decided no, she had to stop the source of it all. She had to get help. She had to go free the gang, especially Cindy and Jimmy, who had defeated Grandma Taters before.

“To the lab!” Libby said to herself and hurried away to Jimmy’s house.

* * * *

Libby peered around the corner of Jimmy’s house and looked at the clubhouse. All looked normal. Gathering her courage, Libby walked up to Vox’s eye with a big grin on her face. “Jimmy? Cindy? Are you in there? Please let me in, it’s Libby!” There was no response. Libby by now was used to the dazed delay everyone had. She waited. Then she knocked “Hey, guys, open up! It’s me Libby!” She waited a good long time then and still no answer. “Hello?” she asked.

“Yes?” Vox answered. Libby had never talked to Vox before.

“Uh, is Jimmy in there?” Libby asked.

“The whereabouts of Jimmy Neutron are on a Need-To-Know Basis,” Vox replied.

“Well, I need to know!” Libby said reasonably.

“Very well,” Vox replied. “Jimmy Neutron is currently at 460 Market Street, downtown Retroville, Texas.”

“460 Market Street? WRET?” Libby asked. She knew the address well, having visited it and sent the DJs letters in the past. DJ Larry was a good friend of hers.

“Yes,” Vox answered. “The studios and broadcasting tower for WRET.”

“Thank you, uh, computer,” Libby said and hurried off.

* * * *

Libby walked by countless grinning people downtown, grinning herself and nodding her head a bit to the music. She looked in the glass doors of the office tower, and saw a smiling receptionist. She danced her way inside and said “Hello Miss Lang! Can I go up and see Larry again? I have to request this great new song I heard. It was so wonderful that I had to come down to request it in person, you know how I am.”

Miss Lang gazed through Libby, smiling, then said “But of course, Libby. Larry is always happy to see you, you’re our number one fan! And I’m willing to bet the song you want to request is ‘Invisible Touch’ by Melvin and the Mindbenders.”

Libby feigned amazement. “How’d you know that?”

“Man, I love that song! It’s our most popular song! Never has a song shot to Number One so fast! We’re playing it four to five times an hour and people still can’t get enough of it. It’s the Number One song in Texas!”

All of Texas under Grandma Tater’s control, Libby thought. Before Grandma Taters had only conquered Retroville, it seems now she had bigger plans. “Thanks a bunch, Miss Lang.” Libby said, and danced her way up the stairs.

* * * *

Libby peered into the studio through the glass in the door, keeping down so not to be seen. There was Grandma Taters! And the rest of the gang too, gathered around a table among the equipment and microphones.

“Here it is, Grandma,” Jimmy said.

“Oh, thank you Deary,” Grandma Taters replied. “Oh, this is so much fun. And such a simple solution too. You two defeated me last time, so I made sure to get you first this time. And with Jimmy’s tabletop nuclear reactor I should be able to increase the broadcast power to reach the entire continent! Oh my, we’re going to have so much fun!”

Libby saw Jimmy was carrying the tabletop nuclear reactor and he placed it on the table.

“Now you’re a smart one, Jimmy, hook this up for dear old Grandma Taters while I go use the little grandma’s room.”

Libby darted into the men’s room and listened at the door. She could hear someone humming in the stall. She hoped he didn’t come out, how embarrassing that would be! She remembered when Cindy accidently went into the boy’s restroom at school. Libby opened the door a crack and saw Grandma Taters exit the studio and go into the ladies room. But before she could leave she heard a voice, “Libby! What on earth are you doing in the men’s room?”

Libby looked around to see Larry standing there, a dazed look in his eyes and a smile upon his face.

“Um,” Libby thought fast. “Miss Lang said I could come up to see you, and when I saw you weren’t in the studio I figured you must be in here.”

Larry laughed, “That’s weird! Whatever you want it must be really urgent, for you to come in here.”

“Oh it is!” Libby said, grinning broadly. “I just had to, HAD TO, come down and request a song. It’s one of the greatest songs I ever heard and I just couldn’t wait.”

“Don’t tell me,” Larry said, “Is it ‘Invisible Touch’ by Melvin and the Mindbenders?”

Libby smiled at Larry and he smiled back. “Man, I love that song!” they both said at the same time.

“Well, come on,” Larry said, “Let’s go play it!” Libby hurried back out with Larry and boldy walked into the studio. “Hi guys!” she said, smiling.

“Hiya Libs!” Sheen answered. “Did your parents like ‘Invisible Touch?’”

“Oh, of course Sheen,” Libby said. “It’s such an awesome song, how could they not?” Libby took out her CD but kept the earphones on. Thankfully it was quiet in the studio, she couldn’t even hear a hint of that diabolical song. Larry sat down at his chair next to the microphone. “Guys! You’ve got to listen to this. Grandma Taters made a new dance remix of ‘Invisible Touch!’ It’s a thousand times better than the original.”

Libby was worried they would argue, might even fight. She didn’t know how she could defeat Cindy’s karate, or if Jimmy shot a freeze beam at her. She was relieved when they all seemed enthusiastic.

“That’s awesome Libby!” Carl said.

“You bet!” Sheen agreed. “Lay it on us Libs!”

Larry had given her a tour of the studio after she kept stopping by, so Libby knew what to do. “Do you mind Larry?” she asked.

“Not at all, Libby, you know this studio better than I!”

Libby went to the Master Player, ejected the CD that was in there, and put ‘Yodeling to the Oldies’ in it. She punched a few buttons, one to broadcast, one to turn the sound on in the studio, and a third to Play. Erin Igorski, yodeling Elvis Presley’s “You Ain’t Nothing But a Hound Dog,” came on and Libby saw it immediately had an effect. As a group the gang screamed, clawed at their ears, and fell to the floor.

 Libby looked at the CD in her hand.  “Melvin and the Mindbenders,” it was labeled, “Invisible Touch. Recorded exclusively for Earthlings.” Libby broke the CD in her hands and bits of it scattered across the studio.

Cindy was the first one back on her feet. “Libby? What’s happening? Where am I? And what is that terrible noise?”

Libby gave Cindy a huggle. “Oh, Cindy, you’re back! That music is ‘Yodeling to the Oldies.’ It’s being broadcast all over Texas right now.”

The guys were standing up too. “Wow,” Sheen said, “I haven’t heard such a terrible song since … I’ve never heard such a terrible song!”

“Guys!” Libby said urgently. “Jimmy, Cindy, I have terrible news. Grandma Taters is here! She could be back in this studio any second! She has, or had, a CD that hypnotized everyone who listened to the song. A song called ‘Invisible Touch’ by Melvin and the Mindbenders.”

“Libby, you can’t hypnotize people with music,” Jimmy said. “You need eye contact.”

“’Invisible Touch?’” Cindy asked. “I thought Phil Collins sang that one!”

“Oh, it wasn’t hypnotism. What did you say?” Libby thought back. “I got it! Something like subliminal commands.”

“That would be possible,” Jimmy agreed.

“I shattered the disk, but I don’t think Grandma Taters will leave without a fight,” Libby said.

 “Well, let her come,” Cindy said confidently. “I beat her last time!”

“You shattered the disk Libby?” Jimmy asked.

“Yes,” Libby had a few shards in her hands. “But there may be other copies about. Copies people made and such. You yourself said you had burned a copy from the WRET web site.”

“Perfect,” Jimmy said. “Guys I have a plan!” Jimmy walked to the console and pulled a chair up next to the computer. “Uh, sir, can I use your computer?”

“Sure thing, kid. Any friend of Libby’s is a friend of mine,” Larry answered.

* * * *

Grandma Taters returned from the bathroom after a few more minutes. “All done, deary?” She saw Libby standing at the console, a wide grin on her face and a dazed look in her eyes. “My goodness, who are you?”

“We didn’t meet last time, Grandma,” Libby said, “But I’m so happy to meet you this time. My name is Libby, I’m a good friend of Jimmy and Cindy.”

Jimmy was smiling too. “Yes, Grandma. I may be a genius but Libby knows this studio well, she’s here all the time to request songs. She’s even been on the air a few times! She helped me hook the reactor up to the broadcast antenna.”

“How delightful! Turn it on, if you would, Libby dear.”

“With pleasure, Grandma,” Libby punched a button on the console and ‘Invisible Touch’ came on, playing over the studio speakers.

“After I have all of America, Mexico, and Canada, Jimmy, you can help us hook up to the satellite communication system so I can reach the whole world,” Grandma Taters said.

“I’d be delighted to do that!” Jimmy said. “You can use my own satellite system. It’s much more efficient and powerful than NASA’s and the Russians.”

“And might I suggest the Armed Forces Radio Network,” Cindy added. “They broadcast to all our troops so you’d have an even bigger army, Grandma.”

“You’ve been oh so helpful, my dears,” Grandma Taters said. The tune continued to play. “Wait a second, something’s not right here. That sounds different. That sounds … sounds …” Grandma Taters suddenly grinned and a vacant look came into her eyes. “Oh my! That sounds wonderful!”

Libby turned off the music and took the cotton out of her ears. The others did the same. “Are you okay, Grandma Taters?” Libby asked.

“Why, Libby dear, I’ve never felt better!” Grandma Taters said with a huge smile.

“Good thing you always carry cotton with you Carl!” Libby said, and kissed Carl on the cheek.

Carl blushed. “Libby! That’s twice you’ve kissed me!”

“Hey, don’t get any funny ideas Carl,” Sheen said, taking Libby’s hand.

“What did you do Neutron?” Cindy asked.

“I used the song still on the WRET web site,” Jimmy explained. “With the added power of the tabletop nuclear reactor, and a few modifications to the subliminal commands, I was able to ‘beam’ the song into Grandma Tater’s brain.” Jimmy sat down at the console keyboard and typed away furiously. “Just a few more things to do.”

“Well, that was interesting,” Larry said. “Now I can finally play some decent songs. Libby, as I understand it, you helped save the day. You have the honors of the first request.”

“How about the proper ‘Invisible Touch’ by Phil Collins and Genesis,” Libby said. “Man, I love that song!”

“You’ve got it, Libby,” Larry said, and turned to his microphone.

Sheen fell to a knee in front of Libby. “Sheen? What ARE you doing?”

“Libby,” Sheen said, “I remember capturing you in Jimmy’s club house. Oh Libby, we practically TORTURED you! Can you ever forgive us?”

“Yeah, Libby,” Cindy said sadly. “We weren’t very nice to you.”

Libby lifted Sheen back to his feet and gave him a kiss on the lips. Sheen fell over on the floor, a dazed look in his eyes and a huge grin on his face. “Does that mean I’m forgiven?”

“Of course, Sheen,” Libby said, with a genuine smile this time. “You all are. You didn’t know what you were doing!”

“Well you sure knew what you were doing Libby,” Jimmy said, not looking up from his keyboard. “Using ‘Yodeling to the Oldies’ to break the spell was brilliant. I thought I was the only genius in town!”

Libby felt herself grow warm in the cheeks.

“There!” Jimmy said with satisfaction. “I’ve removed the song from the web site, and created a worm and a virus to track down and delete all other copies of the song from anywhere else on the Web.”

“But Jimmy,” Carl said, “I’m sure there’s a few more copies about. Burned to disk, like Libby said.”

“We’ll just have to keep ‘Yodeling to the Oldies’ on hand for that,” Jimmy said. “But I think the main threat is over. But now, what to do with Grandma Taters?”

“Oo, Jimmy, did you erase that modified version of ‘Invisible Touch?’” Libby asked.

“No, not yet,” Jimmy said.

“Then I have an idea!” Libby said.

* * * *

The gang stood on the roof of the WRET building, next to the broadcast antenna, with Grandma Taters. They watched as a flying saucer descended and three other Grandma Taters got out.

“I’m sorry, girls, I was defeated again,” Grandma Taters said.

“That’s all right, Annie,” another Grandma Taters said. “Come with us. It’s Bingo Night at the Koolari Nebula!”

“Yes, we can always try try again!” a third Grandma Taters said.

The original Grandma Taters went up the ramp then turned around, her eyes black, and said “We’ll be back!” The ramp pulled into the ship and the saucer zipped off into the air.

“Oh, I don’t think so,” Libby said with a smile.

* * * *

As earth shrunk in the Tater Ship’s rear view mirror, Grandma Taters said “Oh, girls, I’ve got the most fantastic song to listen to on the trip back. You’re simply going to love it! You won’t be able to get it out of your heads.” Grandma Tater’s pulled a CD out of her purse and put it into the flying saucers console.

‘Invisible Touch’ by Melvin and the Mindbenders came over the speakers and all the Grandmas listened to it.

“Why, that song was wonderful Annie!” one Grandma said, with a huge grin on her face. “Did you find that on the planet we just left?”

“Did we just leave a planet?” Grandma Taters asked. “Dear me, I must be getting forgetful in my old age. Oh well, if I’ve forgotten it the planet can’t be too important, can it?”

“I suppose not,” another Grandma said. “Still, that’s a great song! I can’t wait to share it with all the other Grandmas. Play it again!”

“I’d be delighted to!” Grandma Taters said. “Man, I love that song!”

The End